Do you feel like you have lost yourself in life?
Do you feel unhappy with the current life you are living?
Do you feel like you can be a better person then you already are?
Do you want to experience true happiness, fulfilment, clarity and enlighten your life?
Do you want to learn more about yourself, your passions and what drives you?
Do you want to be the STAR of your own life?
If this sounds like you then the journey of self-discovery is the journey for you.
“knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom” – Aristotle
What is Self-Discovery?
Definition – the act or process of gaining knowledge, insight and understanding of your own abilities, character and feelings.
The journey of self-discovery is not an easy journey to take but is truly a very rewarding experience. Self-discovery is a journey to find one’s true self. It is the process of looking within yourself for the answers you seek to know and learning to accept yourself and your feelings for what they are.
By achieving self-knowledge and becoming self-aware of your own strengths and weaknesses, your own passions and desires and becoming conscious of your own beliefs and values. You can start living by them. These are the things that give your life meaning and when you start living in alignment with your own values you can start living the life you are meant to live. Living your life with passion and purpose.
Self-Discovery is also known as ‘Finding Yourself’, because that is basically what self-discovery is! Finding yourself and regaining your own identity. Every day we are presented with images, adverts and articles which portrays the prefect life, perfect body, perfect everything. It gives us false expectations on what to expect out of life. We lose our own identity to meet the expectations of everyone else. Maybe, you live your life in a certain way to make your parents happy and to meet their expectations… or maybe, you lose yourself when you become a parent, when it becomes all about the children and you forget about yourself. Whatever your situation is, when this happens, you will go through life with dissatisfaction, wondering why, nothing you do makes you happy.
Losing your sense of ‘self’ effects all areas of your life leaving you feeling unhappy, lacking confidence and self-esteem. Feeling like ‘something’ is missing from your life but not being able to work out what the ‘something’ is.
To know what we really want, to know what our passions are and to know what sets our soul on fire, we really need to know ourselves. Many of us go through life, not truly knowing who they actually are. Yeh, sure, we know our names, where we come from, what our favourite foods are etc. But, I mean knowing ourselves on a deeper level. Knowing ourselves more than anyone else can understand us.
To be self-aware and have the courage to be yourself, is the first step towards improving your personal-development.
During your journey of self-discovery, you need to be aware that some things may change and you need to be willing to let that change happen. You may need to cut certain people out your life, you may need to start taking responsibility for yourself (if you don’t already) and you may need time in solitude to heal emotional wounds and work out who you really are with no outside contributions.
You will most probably need to change the way you look at the world and change your attitudes towards situations.
I feel that compassion, generosity and gratitude towards others are important traits to practise while on your journey of self-discovery because to truly understand yourself, you need to be open to understanding others.
Why is Self-Discovery Important?
I feel it is important for every person to take the journey of self-discovery at one time in their life, as there are so many benefits to gain, so much to learn and so many opportunities to undertake, once you open those doors.
Self-discovery is the first step into improving your personal-development. And when and if you decide to undertake the journey….it gives you something meaningful to get up for in the morning. It teaches you to become more self-sufficient and boosts your confidence and self-esteem. You learn to trust in yourself and your own intuition. You will gain emotional strength, which will give you so much personal power and open doors to limitless possibilities.
Starting Your Journey of Self-Discovery?
The first step into your journey of self-discovery is to start asking yourself questions to learn more about yourself…you will need to dig deeper and be truly honest with yourself. It is a good idea to start building an awareness of yourself and your surroundings. To become in a state of mindfulness.
We all rush through life, bouncing from one task to another, without really taking much notice of what we are doing and what we are thinking. By becoming mindful, you become more aware of the present moment. It is the process of noticing how you feel in the moment and amplifying the effects of your five senses…smells, sights, sounds, tastes and touch.
Become mindful of your thoughts
Thoughts are just thoughts, they aren’t real. Once you understand this, it will become easier to ignore the negative ones. When you think critical and doubtful thoughts about yourself…For example;
“I will never be confident to talk in front of that many people” or “I will never be able to draw like that” they are just thoughts…just because you think that, doesn’t make it the truth.
By becoming aware of what you think, you will be able to take control of those thoughts and eliminate the negative ones straight away because they don’t do you any good. They only hold you back from reaching your true potential.
Let go of negative thoughts
You need to let go of all negative thoughts by learning to actually listen to what you’re thinking. Once you build an awareness of yourself on this level, you will be able to distinguish the difference between helpful and unhelpful thoughts, which will help you immensely in your journey of self-discovery and improving your personal-development.
During your journey, you will most likely bump into things you would much rather avoid…however, if you really want to learn more about yourself and grow as a human being, you will have to dig up things from your past and make sense of them. This is because certain situations and experiences we had in our past, influence and shape who we are today. We inherent beliefs from our family, friends and surroundings and believe them without question. Some of these beliefs hold us back from reaching our true potential and stop us from being who we really are. And when you really think about them, you may realise…you don’t actually agree with them. So I suggest you prepare yourself for this and be brave and face your inner demons head on.
Connect with your inner child
When you go back I dissect your past to learn more about yourself, you need to also reconnect with your inner child. Try and remember what brought you joy? What did you do when you lost track of time? What did your parents have to drag you away from? What did you love to do before you were forced to grow up and made to believe that you had more important things to do?
These are the questions you need to ask to learn more about yourself and to find your true passions in life that set your soul on fire. But remember, if you feel yourself resisting, then you know it’s worth doing! Nothing worth doing is easy. It’s the things that push us out of our comfort zones that help us find the answers to our questions…
Let go of the need to be loved by everyone
We all feel the need for validation from others. This is a trait inherited from childhood. When we looked to adults to be told what was wrong and what was right. We all loved the encouragement we got when we were doing something ‘good’ and hated getting wrong for the ‘bad’ things we did. We would believe when we were getting told off that it was because they didn’t like us or didn’t want to allow us to have fun. We would respond back with hateful words like “I hate this family” or “I don’t want you to be my Mam any more…”.
But as adults, we need to move past this. Yes, it is always nice to be recognised for the good we do but if you are only doing ‘good’ to get recognition for it…then you will be forever disappointed. You need to do good because it makes you feel good…otherwise what the point of it. We sometimes have to do things we don’t particularly want to do to help others but ultimately, once you see the other person benefiting from your help…it will make you feel good on the inside.
However, on the flip side…don’t do what anybody asks you…just to make them like you. No matter what you do, you will never be able to keep everyone happy. Changing yourself into someone you’re not, to be liked or loved by another person is unauthentic and will ultimately make you unhappy. You NEED to learn to be yourself and once you embrace who you really are, the right people will come to you and like and love you for who you really are. This is far more rewarding then having someone like you for who you are pretending to be.
Be your own weird, quirky and authentic self and you will attract like-minded people who will love you for who you are…these are the people that matter!
“If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.” ~Maya Angelou
Tips to take with you on your journey
- Step out your comfort zone – always make sure you are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. Remember, if you feel yourself resisting, then you know it’s worth doing!
- Become a forever beginner – always try new things…there maybe something out there that you are really good at but you will never know if you don’t look. Take a class, find a hobby and keep exploring.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help – asking for help does not mean you are not capable…it means you are brave enough to reach out and get what you want. Find a mentor and don’t be scared to get self-help books. Those books are filled with wisdom from people who have lived through exactly what you are living through, don’t be stubborn and think you know better because there is always something new to learn out there.
- Meditation / Affirmations / Journalling – Yes, this again. This should be my mantra. Meditation, affirmations and journalling practises help you to connect with your soul, your inner self….your true self. They help you stay grounded, present, motivated and focused.
- Be ready for dead ends – you will most like bump into many dead ends during your journey of self-discovery but don’t let this discourage you…this journey has no set deadline to be finished, so be patient and don’t rush…everything will happen in its own time.
Well this brings me to the end of my post…but I would like to offer you a “Self-Discovery Journal Prompts” booklet to help you on your way. Just click here to find your free PDF download. It is filled with thought provoking questions that will help you explore and understand yourself on a deeper level.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and I do hope this has helped you in some way or encouraged you to take your own journey of self-discovery. Please leave me a comment down below if you have anything to add or have any questions to ask.
Also if there is a certain subject you would like me to write about, please do not hesitate to contact me and I will do my best to help you.
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